She should want to see you sucessful and content in your career as well as being happy with her. Not one or the other. She is forcing you to choose by saying what she said. You should be happy with all aspects of your life and not forced to pick and choose at someone's command. A truely understanding life partner should want to see you succede and rise to the top of your field and not drop your dreams like they are unimportant. I am sure there is a way for both you and her to be a success without the absolute choice of one or another. My immediate counter would have been throwing the question right back at her. But then again, it would have backfired as the socital standard for males has always been the "provider." On a lighter note, you can tell her that you will play "house wife" if she pulls down 100k a year so you won't be burnened with a career and can devote 100% of your time to her while she follows her dreams.