Q: What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
A: One is white, made out of plastic, and dangerous for kids to play with and the other you carry your groceries in.

Q: How can you tell if Michael Jackson has a hot date?
A: There’s a big wheel parked outside his house.

Q: Why does Michael Jackson like twenty eight year olds?
A: Because there are twenty of them.

Q: Who does Michael Jackson consider a Perfect “10″?
A: Two 5 year olds.

Q: How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
A: From a catalogue.

Q: What has 18 balls and 3 pubic hairs?
A: A Michael Jackson slumber party.

Q: Did you know they’re putting out a Michael Jackson stamp?
A: Fans get to vote for the white or black Michael Jackson.

Q: What’s brown and often found in a baby’s diaper?
A: Michael Jackson’s hand.

Michael Jackson's last words were “Take me to the Childrens Hospital”

Since he is made out of 95% of plastic, they’re going to melt him into legos so all the kids can play with him.

Q: Have you heard about Michael Jackson's New Book?
A: It's called, "The In's and Out's of Child Rearing"

Did you hear they're burying Michael Jackson in a children's cemetery? They're paying the gravediggers $20 million to look the other way.

The initial autopsy results indicate the cause of death was choking on a small bone.

Reports of Michael Jackson having a heart attack are incorrect. He was found in the children’s ward having a stroke.

Michael Jackson died of a heart attack after he discovered that 'boys to men' is a band and not a delivery service.

What's got 400 legs and no pubic hair?
The front row at a Michael Jackson concert.

What was MJ's favourite TV program?
Come Dancing.

How do you seperate the men from the boys at Neverland?
With a crowbar.

Michael Jackson's family are wondering how they are going to store his body, as recycling isn't collected for another week.

If Maggie Thatcher dies soon, that will be 2 people who f***ed miners gone.

Reports say that Michael Jackson had requested to be buried at sea. He said there was more chance of him being around small buoys.

Word from hell has it that Michael is upset that everyone is going through his stuff, quoting "I only wanted children to touch my junk!"

He really died of choking on some 12 yr old nuts.

Hey, have you heard! Jackson 5 tickets 20% off!

What does Michael Jackson and JC Penny have in common? Boys pant's half off.

How did Michael Jackson learn to moonwalk...?
Creeping out of kids' bedrooms.