I am getting married to a lovely girl who has a dog that has some annoying problems:

1:the dog poops (usually on stuff that i own) when ever we leave him,punish him, or dont pay 10 tons of attention to him. I call them revenge poops.

2: The dog goes bonkers when we leave and will cry, bark and attack the door. One time he went as far as snapping at my fiance's face ,as she was carrying him outside to say goodbye to me. Because she didnt want to leave him for 5 minutes(he will freak out).

3: Every time their is food around, he will scratch at our legs(begging). They're have been times when he immiediatly pooped on the floor after we scold him for scratching.

4: Fiance lets dog sleep on bed all the time. I have a bigger problem with this one. I dont mind it every once and a while, but i am a light sleeper who wakes up 6-8 times a night and every time the dog makes noise(pug=a lot) i wake up. If i spend the night (rare lately) and ask if we can sleep alone, my fiance (thankfully) agrees, but then the pug will start crying ,moaning, barking and yelping. The fiance will usually give in before me, but the end result has always been the dog sleeps with us.

5: He also learned to scratch at door to use bathroom. Which would be nice except he does it 5-7 times a day(mostly when we are together ie:dinner,intimate, before bed). Then he will go out and play, sometimes he goes the bathroom sometimes not. My Fiance suggests it is normal andher dog needs to go out 4-5 times a day(little bladder), but all the dogs i have grown up with, needed to go twice a day max. When he does it is sometimes 2 hours after we have walked him, she will say: ohh i just dont want him to have a accident and then takes him out.

6: Sometimes it seems as if the dog runs her(our) life. She will not board it, usually wont leave it with friends or family. Because of that, i never forsee a vacation or trip together and that worries me. She Wont leave him for more than 4 hours at a time. Every thing he does wrong (every thing i have listed)she blames on herself and says that she needs to spend more time with him.

7:whenever he is freaking out about being left alone. She will come in and shower him with love and affection and comfort him. I tend to suspect that this is reinforcing his fears.

another problem is whenever i suggest to my fiance about us needing to train him better. she gets defensive and says i did the best i could training him(she takes it personally).

Sorry its so long, and thanks in advance