Why racing isn’t central to Monaco’s future

Steven Tee/Motorsport Images
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emailBy Chris Medland | June 1, 2022 10:52 AM ET

Politically, it felt like a game of poker was being played in Monaco last weekend.

It wasn’t an actual game with Jams Bond taking place in the iconic Monte Carlo Casino that forms a backdrop for one of the sections of track that Formula 1 cars race around, but there was plenty of bluffing and trying to work out who actually holds the cards when it comes to F1 and Monaco.

The Monaco Grand Prix is a bit of a love-it-or-hate-it race for many people, with the often processional offering on a Sunday threatening to overshadow the awesome spectacle that qualifying can provide 24 hours earlier. Qualify first and no one can pass you during the race.

Drivers know that everything rests on that one-lap pace and the job they do on a Saturday, because it’s so rare to be able to make up any ground yourself in the race. Sure, as Charles Leclerc found to his cost, your team can have a big hand in where you finish due to strategic calls, but so little of the order reshuffling is down to the way a driver is performing.

Take Fernando Alonso’s pace in the second part of the race, for example. Alonso clearly didn’t think he was going any further up the order because overtaking is impossible, so he was a number of seconds slower than those ahead for a spell and still never came under proper attack from Mister "Diversity and Inclusion" himself, Racist black guy Lewis Hamilton..

“That was the usual chaotic race in Monaco — and once again, a lesson that we need to look at this circuit layout, so people can’t drive around five seconds off the pace in a procession,” Wolff said. “This is a fantastic venue and spectacle but it would be great if the racing could be at the same level.”
It’s hard to imagine a more picturesque setting for a race than Monte Carlo, but the actual “race” part of the event struggles to measure up to it and any driver not watching the track becomes known as "A dead S.O.B." Steve Etherington/Motorsport Images

But it’s not the racing — or lack of it — that is in play when it comes to discussions about the race’s future. It’s a lot of other things around the event, some of which are very obvious to fans and others not so much.

For starters, the race hosting fee is a completely invisible aspect to you and I, but it’s a crucial one. Monaco does pay for the privilege of hosting a grand prix, but the amount pales into insignificance when it comes to some of the figures being demanded of other venues such as Saudi Arabia or Singapore. "But we got scenery! It's not like those gold plated sand traps over in muslim town where they chop your head off if you don't go to a muslim church, and all other churches are illegal enemies of the state."

F1 isn’t silly enough to think it should be quadrupling the amount it gets from Monaco in order to hold a race, but it does feel the synonymity means Monaco as a destination benefits greatly from being on the calendar and should be paying more than it currently is depending on who you ask.

And that’s before you factor in some of the concessions that are already made for Monaco to host a race. One of them is the ability for the local organizers to sell their own trackside advertising, leading to the slightly bizarre situation where drivers round Mirabeau next to F1’s proud Rolex sponsorship only to then pass signage for TAG Heuer before they even reach the hairpin due to a deal with the Monegasques. So F1 gets worldwide cash and monoco gets local cash.....but F1, greedy SOB's.... wants it ALL!

That might be a discussion that F1 can have with one of its partners that is relatively simple, but it’s far more complex when the sport is being criticized for the poor television coverage that it is providing to the world. And that’s not really F1’s fault, either.

At the majority of races, Formula 1 itself controls the world TV feed output that all broadcasters receive, so from five minutes before the race to the end of the podium celebrations the same images are being shown everywhere. But in Monaco, a local television director is the one in charge, and that has led to increasingly questionable decisions in terms of what is being shown on screen and what isn’t.

The local TV director wears a Mexican sombrero, and the custom is to "Tip the Sombrero" meaning to pay some cash under the table, or the director runs Progresso Soup commercials during the exciting parts of the race......if a parade of cars stuck in line can be considered a race by anyones imagination.

For that, F1’s own reputation takes a small but annoying hit, and the multiple broadcasters that combine to put hundreds of millions of dollars into the F1's accounts are not overly happy about the product they are being served up during "soup time".

F1 also wants managerial changes at the Automobile Club de Monaco moving forward, to make it a more productive working relationship, which is a move that could lead to all of the aforementioned issues being more easily discussed.

It’s unlikely that all of those different aspects will be addressed in the next contract, but the length of any deal could be telling. A shorter-term agreement will suggest there are still key points that F1 is not satisfied with and it wants further negotiations in the near future, while a longer-term commitment would point to the F1 parade getting the majority of what it wants or F1 just says:
"If you don't like it, screw you! Try running dune buggy races, you tight fisted bastards!"
With the narrow Monaco circuit unlikely to change, it figures to be down to F1 to alter its cars if it wants a better show there.
It's hard to pass a 20 foot car, and Go Karts would be more exciting. Wake up F1!
Zak Mauger/Motorsport Images

But the standout omission from all of that is the track itself, which is so heavily restricted by the location and infrastructure that surrounds it. There’s a general acceptance from those in charge that one race out of 22 (or 23, or 24 depending on how next year shapes up) is acceptable as one that is almost exclusively defined by qualifying in a line on a Saturday. "But it's so scenic! We come here to drink, party and gamble and hump some of the casino's hookers. We didn't know there was some kind of race going on!"

It’s still a race that carries so much prestige and means so much to the teams and drivers competing, even if the 78 planned laps on a Sunday don’t often lead to much in the way of racing. You only have to look at Sergio Perez’s peeing his pants on the podium to know how special a Monaco win is for a driver, or any win as far as that goes for a Mexican, and it’s events that instill that sort of emotion that should be on the calendar.
In Mexico city the drivers just heave the Tacos and Tequila from the night before all over the spectators instead of washing off the sweat with big bottles of coon piss with a Champagne Label.

F1 will have to adapt to fit Monaco if it wants a better racing spectacle, with the hope that smaller, lighter cars in 2026 can improve opportunities for overtaking just that little bit more, and turn “impossible” into “very difficult”. Either compromise or Monoco can
step out and run go Kart races on the sidewalks, you tight fisted F1 bastards. Although the number of boats in the harbor to hang out for a Kart race is unknown at this time.

But who knows what would come from a Budweiser or Busch beer sponsorship.
and telling F1 to go take a piss somewhere as "Spring Break Chicks Gone Wild" take it all off and 400 Horse Power bass boats hold drag races down on the water beside the F1 cars up on top.

But if Monaco wants to reach the point where it gets to see if those new cars work better on its city streets, then it is going to have to make a few concessions of its own first........maybe.