Ginger Statistics
- 324,904 kids are born with Gingervitis a year.
- 90% of gingers are overweight and obese
- 100% of people with gingervitis can not get a tan
- 10% of kids born with Gingervitis commit suicide by age 16.
- 30% of those infected with Gingervitis live healthy, productive, long lives. (NOT)
- 50% of those people with gingervitis do not come out until they over 20 years of age
- 20% of those infected with Gingervitis feel great self-hatred, and attempt to bite others in hopes they will spread Gingervitis.
- 15% of all people in the US will at one time be bitten by a child with Gingervitis.
- 12% of those bitten don't know the proper steps to take after being bitten.
- 10% above shoot themselves in the hope of a cure. The remaining 2% gnaw at the infected area like a trapped coyote.
- 0.5% of the world know that the the only cure for Gingevitus is a silver bullet in the brain.
- 22% of those bitten only come out on a full moon
- 80% of Ginger kids are totally unaware they are soulless.
- 20% of those infected with Gingervitis know they don’t have souls and pursue a life devoted to Satanism, Paganism, and/or Politics.
- Gingers can't play football because they think that getting hit by a football helmet causes stretch marks.
- 99% of "real" people take the piss out of Gingers who have dyed their hair because they look even worse.
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