Just buy a mini-van and get it over with.

Might I suggest a Caravan? They've got good incentives on them right now.

And I'll tell you right now that the Passat, Jetta and Audi won't fit two bikes upright with their front wheels off, not even close. We've got friends with all of the above and the cargo area (even when the seats are folded) isn't as big as you think (or on paper). The Forester is about the only wagon with the inner altitude you require.

Just don't go Ford again.