so another late night at Secret Services proved to bestow upon me another night of sleep while behind the wheel. As i cruised down my usual path of destruction, i stumbled across a lonely jetta with exhaust and shaved badges.

i pulled up next to the bivarian econo-box and found all the windows to be rolled down and some form of techno-dance beat to be blaring from inside. this apparently is a trait amongst VW owners. so i tried to fit in and turn up my soundtrack to Rent. Unfortunately, it is a musical about gay people, so i probably looked pretty dumb. anyways, i pulled past him and i guess i threatened the poor Uber-racer and he layed into the gas, allowing me to hear his miniscule turbo wheezing under the hood. he nears my door and we enter into a nice right hander, but only he's on the inside, so naturally, he slowly pulls away. being the tired, incoherent, irresponsible driver that i am, i wake up enough to follow suit and wait by his side for the next coming red light.

as we pull up to the light, i look over and give a quick blip of the gas. unfortunatley, nissan put a truck motor in my car so i dont think he heard it. when the light dropped green, we squeeled away. i got the wholeshot off the line and put his front tire at my back window. he managed to hang on through first and i slammed second gear like a screen door in a hurricane. as i dozed waiting for redline, i managed to grab third gear, nearly putting my fist through my dash. not only did nissan put a truck motor in my car, but they were kind enough to include the shifter, too. at this point, he was still at my rear window, but i was beginning to pull. by midway through 4th gear, i had him at my bumper.

we came to the next light and he wouldnt even look over at me. its a shame he spent so much money to be beat by a 12 yr old blue beater