I crashed my friend's BMW
I crashed my friend's BMW
I have an officemate/old friend who went to vacation in Hawaii. He's vacationing with his family and since we're good friends, I joked about borrowing his old sedan (a BMW 3 series). To my surprise, he said yes. So I drove it excitedly back to our house and I told my wife it was Brad's (my friend's).
I was supposed to return it a week after, and his sister who will be coming to his house will wait for it. But my wise wife decided to use it WITHOUT MY PERMISSION. SHE LATER SAID SHE WAS ONLY GONNA FLAUNT IT TO HER AMIGA. She crashed the car!! I am super furious even as I type this now! Because of her, my good friend was "turned off" because I couldn't take care of HIS CAR that I borrowed.
My wife and I are still not talking. I now have a nickname in our office and rumors are circulating about me, a guy who "borrows a BMW and crashes it because he doesn't know how to drive". As much as I'm angry, I want to resolve this conflict with my wife. But she has sky high ego and won't even fix her mistake and apologize properly. I can't believe I married someone like this. What should I do?
I was supposed to return it a week after, and his sister who will be coming to his house will wait for it. But my wise wife decided to use it WITHOUT MY PERMISSION. SHE LATER SAID SHE WAS ONLY GONNA FLAUNT IT TO HER AMIGA. She crashed the car!! I am super furious even as I type this now! Because of her, my good friend was "turned off" because I couldn't take care of HIS CAR that I borrowed.
My wife and I are still not talking. I now have a nickname in our office and rumors are circulating about me, a guy who "borrows a BMW and crashes it because he doesn't know how to drive". As much as I'm angry, I want to resolve this conflict with my wife. But she has sky high ego and won't even fix her mistake and apologize properly. I can't believe I married someone like this. What should I do?
1. Marriage is forever. Don't ever bring it up to her again. It is really between her and
someone else.
-----------------
2. Accept no blame for what someone else does. Don't discuss it with anyone else
including the office bastards......and next time you get the keys....keep the keys.
---------------
3. And since the keys and responsibility were handed to you, as a responsible person
it would be the right thing to do to start sending some money every week to the guy
who gave you the keys and the responsibility. When the amount you send equals the
book value of the BMW, you have paid for the car.
4. In the future Don't borrow anything which you cannot pay for.
someone else.
-----------------
2. Accept no blame for what someone else does. Don't discuss it with anyone else
including the office bastards......and next time you get the keys....keep the keys.
---------------
3. And since the keys and responsibility were handed to you, as a responsible person
it would be the right thing to do to start sending some money every week to the guy
who gave you the keys and the responsibility. When the amount you send equals the
book value of the BMW, you have paid for the car.
4. In the future Don't borrow anything which you cannot pay for.
I have an officemate/old friend who went to vacation in Hawaii. He's vacationing with his family and since we're good friends, I joked about borrowing his old sedan (a BMW 3 series). To my surprise, he said yes. So I drove it excitedly back to our house and I told my wife it was Brad's (my friend's).
I was supposed to return it a week after, and his sister who will be coming to his house will wait for it. But my wise wife decided to use it WITHOUT MY PERMISSION. SHE LATER SAID SHE WAS ONLY GONNA FLAUNT IT TO HER AMIGA. She crashed the car!! I am super furious even as I type this now! Because of her, my good friend was "turned off" because I couldn't take care of HIS CAR that I borrowed.
My wife and I are still not talking. I now have a nickname in our office and rumors are circulating about me, a guy who "borrows a BMW and crashes it because he doesn't know how to drive". As much as I'm angry, I want to resolve this conflict with my wife. But she has sky high ego and won't even fix her mistake and apologize properly. I can't believe I married someone like this. What should I do?
I was supposed to return it a week after, and his sister who will be coming to his house will wait for it. But my wise wife decided to use it WITHOUT MY PERMISSION. SHE LATER SAID SHE WAS ONLY GONNA FLAUNT IT TO HER AMIGA. She crashed the car!! I am super furious even as I type this now! Because of her, my good friend was "turned off" because I couldn't take care of HIS CAR that I borrowed.
My wife and I are still not talking. I now have a nickname in our office and rumors are circulating about me, a guy who "borrows a BMW and crashes it because he doesn't know how to drive". As much as I'm angry, I want to resolve this conflict with my wife. But she has sky high ego and won't even fix her mistake and apologize properly. I can't believe I married someone like this. What should I do?
__________________
Keystone Motor Club (Founded 2012)... Free car show Every 3rd Saturday, newsletter is
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/e...-car-club.html
Keystone Facebook ...click: "Keystone Motor Car Club"
Port Richey Rod Run at Coast Buick GMC Coming May 25 2024
https://carstoshow.com/registerevent.aspx?eventid=99114
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1730 US-19, Holiday Fl 34691 click: https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/t...-racing.html CHRA sanctioned cruise-in.
Cruise-In; Free; Every Saturday 5-8PM plus 10% off the whole menu to cruisers
All Cars Every 2nd Saturday Free Breakfast: Since 2015 and more. click: https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/e...ast-tampa.html
Tampa Racing.com covers the Tampa car scene and supports many fund raisers, worthy causes and events that enrich our community. We hope you enjoy them all.
What do I do? ---- on-site *Aftermarket* spring/suspension installations --- on-site impact wrenching---street lowering with your own stock springs...........True Bi-xenon HID projector headlight conversions........ Much more at Bob's Garage!
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/b...ontact-us.html
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/b...e-senor-honda/
Keystone Motor Club (Founded 2012)... Free car show Every 3rd Saturday, newsletter is
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/e...-car-club.html
Keystone Facebook ...click: "Keystone Motor Car Club"
Port Richey Rod Run at Coast Buick GMC Coming May 25 2024
https://carstoshow.com/registerevent.aspx?eventid=99114
50's Diner US19.... A Florida Attraction.
1730 US-19, Holiday Fl 34691 click: https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/t...-racing.html CHRA sanctioned cruise-in.
Cruise-In; Free; Every Saturday 5-8PM plus 10% off the whole menu to cruisers
All Cars Every 2nd Saturday Free Breakfast: Since 2015 and more. click: https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/e...ast-tampa.html
Tampa Racing.com covers the Tampa car scene and supports many fund raisers, worthy causes and events that enrich our community. We hope you enjoy them all.
What do I do? ---- on-site *Aftermarket* spring/suspension installations --- on-site impact wrenching---street lowering with your own stock springs...........True Bi-xenon HID projector headlight conversions........ Much more at Bob's Garage!
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/b...ontact-us.html
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/b...e-senor-honda/
Last edited by senor honda; 10-26-2017 at 02:00 PM.
We had a major fight again about the same issue. It was so bad that we ended up deciding that we need couples counseling. We know that we love one another and this tragedy should not affect us but it's really killing the gears of our relationship. We still want to be together so we are going to work things out through counseling. I hope it's not too late for us.
A willingness to talk about a conflict with a counselor is a step in the right direction.
---------
I would try to avoid making any accusations, and let the counselor
assign blame, if assigning blame must be done. It's better that the
counselors words be the words to disagree with, instead of disagreeing
with each other.
---------------
I would start with things that both of you agree on
and list what you both agree on.
-------------
After talking about things you both agree on, write down a
separate list of items that the two of you disagree on.
------------
Always let the counselor make decisions, and your role is
to discuss what he wants to explore.
------------------
---------
I would try to avoid making any accusations, and let the counselor
assign blame, if assigning blame must be done. It's better that the
counselors words be the words to disagree with, instead of disagreeing
with each other.
---------------
I would start with things that both of you agree on
and list what you both agree on.
-------------
After talking about things you both agree on, write down a
separate list of items that the two of you disagree on.
------------
Always let the counselor make decisions, and your role is
to discuss what he wants to explore.
------------------
We had a major fight again about the same issue. It was so bad that we ended up deciding that we need couples counseling. We know that we love one another and this tragedy should not affect us but it's really killing the gears of our relationship. We still want to be together so we are going to work things out through counseling. I hope it's not too late for us.
__________________
Keystone Motor Club (Founded 2012)... Free car show Every 3rd Saturday, newsletter is
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/e...-car-club.html
Keystone Facebook ...click: "Keystone Motor Car Club"
Port Richey Rod Run at Coast Buick GMC Coming May 25 2024
https://carstoshow.com/registerevent.aspx?eventid=99114
50's Diner US19.... A Florida Attraction.
1730 US-19, Holiday Fl 34691 click: https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/t...-racing.html CHRA sanctioned cruise-in.
Cruise-In; Free; Every Saturday 5-8PM plus 10% off the whole menu to cruisers
All Cars Every 2nd Saturday Free Breakfast: Since 2015 and more. click: https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/e...ast-tampa.html
Tampa Racing.com covers the Tampa car scene and supports many fund raisers, worthy causes and events that enrich our community. We hope you enjoy them all.
What do I do? ---- on-site *Aftermarket* spring/suspension installations --- on-site impact wrenching---street lowering with your own stock springs...........True Bi-xenon HID projector headlight conversions........ Much more at Bob's Garage!
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/b...ontact-us.html
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/b...e-senor-honda/
Keystone Motor Club (Founded 2012)... Free car show Every 3rd Saturday, newsletter is
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/e...-car-club.html
Keystone Facebook ...click: "Keystone Motor Car Club"
Port Richey Rod Run at Coast Buick GMC Coming May 25 2024
https://carstoshow.com/registerevent.aspx?eventid=99114
50's Diner US19.... A Florida Attraction.
1730 US-19, Holiday Fl 34691 click: https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/t...-racing.html CHRA sanctioned cruise-in.
Cruise-In; Free; Every Saturday 5-8PM plus 10% off the whole menu to cruisers
All Cars Every 2nd Saturday Free Breakfast: Since 2015 and more. click: https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/e...ast-tampa.html
Tampa Racing.com covers the Tampa car scene and supports many fund raisers, worthy causes and events that enrich our community. We hope you enjoy them all.
What do I do? ---- on-site *Aftermarket* spring/suspension installations --- on-site impact wrenching---street lowering with your own stock springs...........True Bi-xenon HID projector headlight conversions........ Much more at Bob's Garage!
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/b...ontact-us.html
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/b...e-senor-honda/
Last edited by senor honda; 10-26-2017 at 02:14 PM.
Of the 4 things I put in post #2, it sounds like someone disagreed with one
of them in order to get conflict stirred up again.
--------------
Another possibility is that a disagreement had already started and then
one of you brought up the car incident,
----------------------
of them in order to get conflict stirred up again.
--------------
Another possibility is that a disagreement had already started and then
one of you brought up the car incident,
----------------------
__________________
Keystone Motor Club (Founded 2012)... Free car show Every 3rd Saturday, newsletter is
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/e...-car-club.html
Keystone Facebook ...click: "Keystone Motor Car Club"
Port Richey Rod Run at Coast Buick GMC Coming May 25 2024
https://carstoshow.com/registerevent.aspx?eventid=99114
50's Diner US19.... A Florida Attraction.
1730 US-19, Holiday Fl 34691 click: https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/t...-racing.html CHRA sanctioned cruise-in.
Cruise-In; Free; Every Saturday 5-8PM plus 10% off the whole menu to cruisers
All Cars Every 2nd Saturday Free Breakfast: Since 2015 and more. click: https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/e...ast-tampa.html
Tampa Racing.com covers the Tampa car scene and supports many fund raisers, worthy causes and events that enrich our community. We hope you enjoy them all.
What do I do? ---- on-site *Aftermarket* spring/suspension installations --- on-site impact wrenching---street lowering with your own stock springs...........True Bi-xenon HID projector headlight conversions........ Much more at Bob's Garage!
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/b...ontact-us.html
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/b...e-senor-honda/
Keystone Motor Club (Founded 2012)... Free car show Every 3rd Saturday, newsletter is
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/e...-car-club.html
Keystone Facebook ...click: "Keystone Motor Car Club"
Port Richey Rod Run at Coast Buick GMC Coming May 25 2024
https://carstoshow.com/registerevent.aspx?eventid=99114
50's Diner US19.... A Florida Attraction.
1730 US-19, Holiday Fl 34691 click: https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/t...-racing.html CHRA sanctioned cruise-in.
Cruise-In; Free; Every Saturday 5-8PM plus 10% off the whole menu to cruisers
All Cars Every 2nd Saturday Free Breakfast: Since 2015 and more. click: https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/e...ast-tampa.html
Tampa Racing.com covers the Tampa car scene and supports many fund raisers, worthy causes and events that enrich our community. We hope you enjoy them all.
What do I do? ---- on-site *Aftermarket* spring/suspension installations --- on-site impact wrenching---street lowering with your own stock springs...........True Bi-xenon HID projector headlight conversions........ Much more at Bob's Garage!
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/b...ontact-us.html
https://www.tamparacing.com/forums/b...e-senor-honda/
Last edited by senor honda; 10-26-2017 at 02:12 PM.
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