human race is doomed

**topher469** · 09-19-2007, 01:12 AM

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Fritos:! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how???....)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought????...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because???....)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

**shinysideup** · 09-19-2007, 01:33 AM

Yay SPAM email garbage! thanks for nothing.

**topher469** · 09-19-2007, 08:57 AM

yay your mouth farted!!

oh your welcome

Ford DNA · 09-19-2007, 09:41 AM

lol @ the last one!

TurboRanger91 · 09-19-2007, 09:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ford DNA

lol @ the last one!

you can't sit there and tell me that you've never thought of using your genitals to stop a chainsaw.

droptopsaab8 · 09-19-2007, 09:54 AM

well i found all those hilarious

Ford DNA · 09-19-2007, 10:07 AM

I did, but I thought better of it!

TurboRanger91 · 09-19-2007, 10:16 AM

lawl.

**DrDirt** · 09-19-2007, 02:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ford DNA

I did, but I thought better of it!

Hummm, the evidence shows otherwise.

**Mars_302** · 09-19-2007, 02:46 PM

on the fritos thing, if you read the little info, you can acutally mail them and request a game piece for free

Krautburner · 09-19-2007, 04:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by topher469

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

Vehical use?

TurboRanger91 · 09-19-2007, 04:34 PM

^ that's out door use.

**$hawn** · 09-19-2007, 06:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrDirt

Hummm, the evidence shows otherwise.

**DrDirt** · 09-20-2007, 10:18 AM

$hawn wins the abstract thinking contest!

TurboRanger91 · 09-20-2007, 10:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrDirt

$hawn wins the abstract thinking contest!

not sure if that's abstract thinking or if his mind was in the gutter.... i'm leaning more towards the latter of the two.

09-19-2007, 01:12 AM	#1 (permalink)
topher469 BillionClub Member BISHES Car: 2001 SVT Lightning !! YEAH My TRGarage St. Petersburg : 2147483647	human race is doomed In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods: On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair). On a bag of Fritos:! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)? On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how???....) On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion). On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)! On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought????...) On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?) On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.) On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because???....) On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?) On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.) On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash) On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?) On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.) On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

09-19-2007, 01:33 AM	#2 (permalink)
shinysideup gone fishin Car: My TRGarage town : 2147483647	Yay SPAM email garbage! thanks for nothing.

09-19-2007, 08:57 AM	#3 (permalink)
topher469 BillionClub Member BISHES Car: 2001 SVT Lightning !! YEAH My TRGarage St. Petersburg : 2147483647	yay your mouth farted!! oh your welcome

09-19-2007, 09:41 AM	#4 (permalink)
Ford DNA As Seen On TV! Car: 2006 Lincoln Mark LT, 99 Cobra My TRGarage Zephyrhills : 2147483647	lol @ the last one!

09-19-2007, 09:54 AM	#6 (permalink)
droptopsaab8 Registered User Car: 1994 saab 900s :) My TRGarage : 1011762	well i found all those hilarious

09-19-2007, 10:07 AM	#7 (permalink)
Ford DNA As Seen On TV! Car: 2006 Lincoln Mark LT, 99 Cobra My TRGarage Zephyrhills : 2147483647	I did, but I thought better of it!

09-19-2007, 10:16 AM	#8 (permalink)
TurboRanger91 it's always something Car: 91 Ford Ranger My TRGarage Kansas City, Mo (formerly Clearwater) : 5073566	lawl.

09-19-2007, 02:46 PM	#10 (permalink)
Mars_302 Race Photographer Car: My TRGarage : 2147483647	on the fritos thing, if you read the little info, you can acutally mail them and request a game piece for free

09-19-2007, 04:34 PM	#12 (permalink)
TurboRanger91 it's always something Car: 91 Ford Ranger My TRGarage Kansas City, Mo (formerly Clearwater) : 5073566	^ that's out door use.

09-20-2007, 10:18 AM	#14 (permalink)
DrDirt Team Geritol Racing Car: '91 Mustang Coupe My TRGarage Largo : 2147483647	$hawn wins the abstract thinking contest!